Live from Cairoston

“Where do the days go?”
The beautiful girl asked me.
“Behind the mountains.”

Comments on: "Where the days go – Haiku" (3)

  1. behind the mountains
    sinking in the deepest sea
    with every rolling sun dial

  2. nice! but this is 5-7-7, instead of 5-7-5 (the Haiku format)
    However, if we merge them together into a 5-7-5-7-7 it will be a nice Tanka (a different form of Japanese poetry)

    “Where do the days go?”
    The beautiful girl asked me.
    “Behind the mountains,
    sinking in the deepest sea
    with every rolling sun dial”

  3. well, honestly i wasn’t trying to write Haiku. was just trying to elaborate on your idea/image of “time” “days” expressed by nature, which is the main revolve of Haiku poems as understood from a few short quick readings. i refer to nature here as the revolve. did not understand the syllables division part (5-7-5) part much though, but now you made it clear. Thank you!
    i can see some interesting Youtube teaching videos about too.

    It’s the first time to know about haiku through your blog, and i fell in love with the concept, as it is very close to my own style, and it’s like breaking the rule of “traditional” limiting poetry rules.
    feels like my sketches.

    Now there’s Tanka!
    Will definitely give Japanese poetry more time.

    Thanks again.

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